MUST LUST CATS

I had a dream and we were in it. I went downstairs and found you in the kitchen, talking on a house phone, the old wire cord getting wrapped around you. Suddenly you lost your train of thought in the conversation as we made eye contact. I came to you and gave you a hug. You embraced me warmly and wouldn’t let go, the phone still preoccupying your ear.

“Uh, do you want to come upstairs and see my cat?” you asked, keeping the transmitter away from your mouth.

I answered in the affirmative and walked towards the living room, as you tried to wrap things up on the other end of the line. My mother was on the couch and asked me where I was going.

“Upstairs…his uh, cat died. I’m going to see his dead cat,” was all I could muster on short notice.

I proceeded to collect my belongings, collect myself. I went upstairs. You met me there.

10/18/2014 8:45AM

BABYSHAKES (exposed)

?!

“I fear I’ve just made too much eye contact with a prepubescent boy.” 

 

I want to be a living, visual representation of the things I think and feel. I want to free myself from burdens passed down, delivered, ingrown, harvested and collected. Up is down and left is medium. Art continues to make me its bitch. 9/3/2014 11:42PM

Call it A Lively Experiment 

Watch me manipulate myself into thinking otherwise… 

Being typecast as The Victim is oh so boring

XOXO, BabyShakes

THIS IS THE STUFF THAT KEEPS YOU UP AT NIGHT

THIS IS THE POINT

WHERE, EYES RED, YOU’VE FINALLY REALIZED

THAT YOU’VE LOST YOUR BEST FRIEND

REALLY, REALLY LOST THEM

AND THAT DESPITE THE FACT THAT YOU BOTH FEEL A LITTLE LESS CRAZY WITHOUT EACH OTHER

IT’S A TENSION THAT FELT NATURAL

YOU GOT USED TO A KIND OF TOUCH

A KIND OF EAR AND CONVERSATION

THAT OFTEN FLOWED FROM ARGUMENTATIVE

TO ONE OF ABSOLUTE AGREEMENT WITHIN A MATTER OF MINUTES.

***********************************************************************

I AM NOT MADE OF HIS RIB

BUT WE DID SHARE A HEART, FOR A TIME

A TIME, A TIME NOT TOO LONG AGO

HE CHASED AFTER ME

I RAN AWAY, ONLY TO BEG OF HIM LATER

HIS EYES WERE GLITTERY WHEN I RETURNED FROM ONE MY LOWEST POINTS TO DATE

FOR ONCE, I FELT HE WAS FINALLY FEELING SOMETHING…

FOR ONCE, I ACTUALLY FELT LIKE WE WERE BOTH ON THE SAME PLANET…

I JUST WISHED THESE THINGS HAD PRESENTED THEMSELVES EARLIER ON.

*******************************************************************************

WE ARE BOTH TO BLAME.

10/8/2014: 12: 83 AM

BABY$HAKES (#artstar)

Photo on 2014-06-13 at 18.21

BABY$HAKES (#artstar)

I AM BEAUTIFUL

AND DELICATE

I AM SOFT

AND WARM

I AM IN CONTROL

I KNOW WHAT I’M DOING

AND EVERYBODY LOVES ME

PEOPLE THROW MONEY AT ME

JUST FOR SHOWING UP

I CREATE “IMPORTANT WORK”

AND EVERYONE “LIKES” MY PICTURES

“LIKES” FILL MY HEART WITH GLEE

MY MAMA’S NOT CRAZY

AND NEITHER AM I

MY DADDY’S NOT DRUNK

AND NEITHER AM I

I CREATE “IMPORTANT WORK”

AND EVERYBODY LOVES ME

PEOPLE THROW MONEY AT ME

JUST FOR SHOWING UP

MY LUST RUNS DEEP

AND IS TANGIBLE

ALL MY LOVES ARE REAL

NOT GHOSTS

MY AMBITION FUELS ME

AND NOTHING CAN DISTRACT ME

I CREATE “IMPORTANT WORK”

AND EVERYBODY LOVES ME

BABY, THE WORLD IS MY HOME…

2:35AM / 9/30/2014

THE PERFORMER

 

THE PERFORMER

Did anyone else notice that?

Did anyone else notice it?

Did anyone else notice the fear in ITS eyes?

I’m not sure if IT’S sure if IT knows

whether or not IT feels like IT’S doing me a disservice

anymore…

I wonder if the audience cares anymore

I wonder if they know which were the laughing moments

and which were the truths

It’s all in the subtlety of an eyelash

It’s all in the quick exhale and inhale of breath

It’s all in the way IT can’t hold my gaze for very long

Quicker to shed material, than to think of something different -

beyond ITS scope…

To think of potential, to dream of hope…

To misread my wide eyes for innocence

IT shows me how much IT hates me and loves me all at once.

IT lays ITS orifice on another

IT begs me to watch

to see how ugly and awful and thoughtless IT is…

to see how much a heart can break at ITS expense

to see how long I’ll stay, if I’ll stay…

It’s like a test I didn’t prepare for but should’ve known was coming.

IT shoos me away for that’s the only thing IT knows how to do

IT feels odd at the compassion IT was given, IT hadn’t seen that in awhile

IT remembers it as a strange sensation that made IT comfortable once

and IT even longed for IT sometimes, still

but year surpasses year and IT’S getting older

and more self-righteous and more set in ITS ways…

or at least that’s the excuse IT gives to ITSELF.

Love is a concept not accepted by IT anymore…

Passionless lust is all IT knows and can vouch for

and no doe-eyed depressive can change that.

The world is a stage

and not meant for the unglamorous weak

Any seasoned professional can tell you that.

8/30/2014 8:10AM

Sarah

Here are some weird ballpoint pen sketches that should probably be turned into prints and/or covers of zines…

Awkward deranged barbie DSC_0299 DSC_0300 DSC_0301 DSC_0302

 

RI Film Festival

I had a blast volunteering for the 2014 edition of the Rhode Island International Film Festival. It was a great opportunity to see some of the best new short and feature length films from around the world.

Here are a list of just some of my favorites. Go check them out and support independent film making!

CON QUIÉN SUEÑA BERTA? (Spain) 

470_1_foto_g 470_4_foto_g

Je suis Une Actrice (France)

Showfolk

monica-lewis-sings-300x290Follow Monica Lewis on Twitter! At 92, she’s still kicking! Literally! 

Market Hours

Sinners

Nous sommes tous des êtres penchés (France) 

942028_540489425994559_289649727_n

So I was just made aware that there are photos from July's Fluxus Funeral. Yeah, it actually happened people. Here's proof...

So I was just made aware that there are photos from July’s Fluxus Funeral. Yeah, it actually happened people. Here’s proof…

 

I consider myself to be infinitely curious and therefore I often push myself beyond my comfort level to try something new and see what happens. This was one of those times.

 

Our small part in all of this: our piece entitled: “When Your Luck Runs Out On You”

ORIGINAL CONCEPT: “The Inspiration:  A co-worker tragically lost her battle to cancer just over the weekend + I’ve been visiting a lot of bingo halls lately with my Mama, her friend, and a bunch of old people (I won 9 dollars once!) =

When your luck runs out / When luck really has nothing to do with it / Death is inevitable
This culminates into a really really brief performance piece! The audience is given bingo cards, Adrienne “Strawberry Moon” will read the numbers out over the microphone. A clip of a noisy bingo hall will play over the speakers. Meanwhile in the center a man will sit on a chair. I will kneel beside him, blindfolded, with a bingo marker. Every time she calls out a number I will mark his body. Someone is guaranteed to win (but at what expense?). When the audience member yells out, “Bingo!” the man will clutch his heart and collapse. The winner will be given a piece of strawberry rhubarb pie. This will take all of five minutes or less.”
AMENDMENTS: Dorian King fills in for Adrienne Jones as bingo caller, smiley face stickers replace bingo marker.

 

 

“If you are interested in taking music lessons, you have come to the right place! Tim Aznavour is now offering private lessons in various styles of music including rock, pop, jazz and classical to guitarists of all abilities.

Whether you’re interested in classical guitar lessons for your child or are an adult trying to pick up the guitar again, you will fit right in at Tim Aznavour’s studio.” (timaznavour.com) 

 

NIGHT FLEA

Scenes from last night’s NIGHT FLEA at 95 Empire:

KIMG0334 KIMG0336 KIMG0337

 

Many thanks to Like No Udder for stopping by with delicious vegan treats, Jim from Infectious Fun Toys for providing food and laughs, and everybody else for just being there.

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